January 15, 2009
Growth through Iron Brides
I know that I have grown from the Iron Brides experience and I am sure that I am not alone in this thinking. In my last blog I commented with how much I have grown personally from being selected to be on the show. To continue my personal growth I plan to follow many things that were taught to us. For instance, I have already incorporated how to financially get on better track and I plan to see that through. I want to be able to be in a place that I feel comfortable for today, tomorrow and the future and Iron Brides helped pave the way for me to be able to do so.
We also learned how to manage stress. For those of you who know me, you know that I have high energy 24-7. I have always managed my stress by working out rigorously. What this show has taught me was that there are other ways to achieve peace of mind. The five Tibetan Rights, (which you will all soon be blessed to see and learn) have become a ritual in my daily life, so much so, that my second graders ask for it daily. We share the notion that it calms the body and soothes the soul. The five postures have become a habit in my life and I plan to commit to it for daily stress relief.
One thing I am willing to change is taking on too much. I would never regret being selected to be on Iron Brides because as you know it has affected me so greatly. But that is not to say that I need to do everything that is out there. If there is one thing more that I learned while being on the show it is balance. I often take on so much without thinking how it could impact my daily life. I would be lying if I said that this experience wasn’t time consuming (in a good way, but still it has required time nonetheless). So with that said, I plan to just focus on Misha, my class, remodeling my house and my wedding planning. That in itself is enough and I don’t need to take on more extracurricular activities to somehow feel more complete. This show has filled that ‘void’ feeling.
My fiance and my family have both reacted with a positive attitude about my commitment to the show. They have supported me 100% through it all and have maintained that this show is right up my alley. They know me and realize that when an opportunity like this comes knocking at my door, that of all people, I will grab it. They have been so interested in knowing what we do on the show and for ‘intellectual property’ sake, I have remained truthful to my vow, and left the airing of the show to answer their questions. They cannot wait to see how Iron Brides unfolds on public television, nor can I for that matter. All I can say is that no matter the outcome I am so very proud to say that I was on season one, in New Hampshire, of the very first Iron Brides show. Not everyone can say that and I am a happy bride -to- be knowing all that I have experienced and learned. Thank you to George, Joann, Jeff and Dave for all your hard work (and Kyle too) as well as all the venues and silent partners along the way. I am one proud teacher, woman and Iron Bride contestant!
January 14, 2009
Changes as a result of Iron Brides
The changes that I have made personally as a result of Iron Brides are under the category of growth. I have grown throughout the process and have learned not only more helpful tips for planning my wedding, but I have learned about myself in the process. I knew that by taking on one more thing, while trying to plan my wedding, teach full time and remodeling our home, would be a challenge, but with that challenge came new strength. When you want something you have to go for it and put your best foot forward. I knew that being on Iron Brides was something that I really wanted and nothing or nobody would stand in the way of it. So here I am today.
Often people ask me how I am able to juggle this many things in my life all at once. I am usually one to take on a lot and handle the situation fine. However, there have been moments (and I am sure there are more to come) that have tested that notion. Filming for the show isn’t just about showing up and looking pretty. There has been a lot of homework; time spent away from loved ones, as well as some soul searching along the way. I have made changes with prioritizing my day and getting things accomplished. One way to do this is by being organized. Iron Brides has helped me with that. We were fortunate enough to be provided with a life coach that gave us sound advice and offered us new ways of looking at things.
In terms of my wedding, another tool that helped keep me keep on track was the software program, The Organized Wedding. This computer program is like your personal assistant wedding planner! It is marvelous! It does everything from giving you proper etiquette to arranging a seating chart. Life is made easier when you have these tools at your fingertips. My wedding planning has also evolved by helping me problem solve some bumps in the road. Just by talking with seven other brides and hearing their advice has been so helpful. It has made me take a closer look at what’s around me and utilize people’s help to overcome my obstacles.
My relationship has strengthened over the last three months. I have listened intently to all the speakers and have taken what I have learned and applied it directly to my life. I communicate more effectively (although I have always communicated a lot). I have also let my family and friends in on the process of my new learning’s (I may even be able to cook better now ☺)! Lastly, financially, I have taken a closer look at my income and expenditures. Our work with the life coach and financial planner has helped significantly with this. I have changed the way I do my finances and have learned how to budget better. In all, I have made some considerable changes and growth in my life and I have Iron Brides to help thank for that!
January 7, 2009
Mood of our wedding
Mood: Tranquil Wedding
The defining characteristic-Oceanside wedding ceremony and reception
Best setting: Remote Island somewhere in the Caribbean, white sands, warm ocean beach
Most expensive version: Yachts that hold entire guests for ceremony and vows, private balcony for newly engaged couple to view sunset: dropped off after vows to outside cabanas for wedding reception complete with a lobster bake and picked back up on the yacht afterwards for private wedding night sail
Make due with: Local beach and function hall
Colors to be seen: ocean colors of midnight blue, tan and ivory
Wearing: long simple fitted gown, ‘flowy’ off white material
Cake: 3-tiered, beach-like effect with beach chair and sand (graham cracker or brown sugar) or beach cupcakes
Food: Buffet style with some seafood choices (crab stuffed mushrooms)
Favors: Beach rocks that are heart shaped and topped with small stones for paperweights (emulate a rock cairn for Misha’s love of hiking)
After party: YES! Taken to by trolley to the beach side Inn On The Blues with live music and late night food and beverage and cottages to sleep in afterwards
Morning-after-brunch: Yes, upstairs at the private room overlooking the short sands ocean for breakfast
What would I hope to hear as the guests leave on Sunday: That this goes down as by far the best Seacoast wedding that wasn’t rushed, well thought out, planned and personal touches present, and the best time they’ve ever had at a wedding!
On being engaged…Wedding daydreams
Misha and I have been engaged for seven months now and we have had wedding daydreams from the start. We want our wedding to be pure and simple with little hassle and stress. With that said, being on Iron Brides has helped in the planning process. It has opened our eyes to what is out there and challenged us to think about what it is that we truly want.
I remember watching the wedding channel as a young teenager. I would watch the show diligently trying to envision what my day would look like. I remember thinking just how plain all the weddings were that I saw. Of course I saw million dollar weddings but that didn’t appeal to me. I never could justify forking out every last penny for just one day. Then I remember watching the wedding movies; the romantic ones, the funny ones (Runaway Bride, Maid of Honor, Father of the Bride) and the sappy ones. All of these were entertaining and far from the truth.
True times come from romantic times spent together in real life. Misha and I have had these times spent evenings on the beach, cookouts outside and hiking together in the woods. It doesn’t always come from expensive dinners out, or bottles of champagne (although those are always nice). Rather times together enjoying ourselves doing nothing special is the real romantic times. The truly best romantic time was Misha’s proposal on top of a 160 foot cliff in Monhegan Island, Maine complete with a picnic and bottle of wine overlooking the foggy ocean water! It goes down as one of the most romantic proposal’s out there. We plan to visit the Island every June as our anniversary of our proposal–a truly magical place with no cell service, television or internet, just each others company!
Our engagement spot
Lighthouse Monhegan Island
Some favorites of ours:
- Music: Our favorite music is the old stuff and even some 80′s! Yup we don’t dress in that style (thank goodness) but some real classic music has stayed a favorite among us. We love Journey, Cheap Trick, Eagles, Jimmy Buffet, Bob Marley and more. I happen to also like the exact opposite style music and listen to techno when I workout or need to be pumped up.
- Food: We love Mexican food! We probably eat Mexican almost weekly and enjoy cooking it and eating out. Stir fry and salads are another food we frequently make. We both love spicy and hot foods so we make our food as tasty as possible. I also enjoy Italian and love making stuffed shells and garlic bread. Misha’s father owns acres of organic garlic which is to die for! It makes the best garlic paste for spreading onto bread.
- Colors: I love red! I like to wear red, throw splashes of red in my decor and drink red wine, who doesn’t love red! Misha I would say likes green. It compliments his amazing eyes.
- Travel Destinations: Sailing! We want to sail across the seas. We plan to make our honeymoon spot somewhere in the Caribbean so we can scope out destinations to travel back to via sailboat. We also want to go to Italy, France, Australia, and more. Traveling is definitely on our agenda!
Together we have decided to incorporate the Seacoast theme into our wedding. The rehearsal dinner, the reception, the after party, the beach party the next day, and the entire weekend ,Wednesday through Sunday, all takes place on the Seacoast. We both love the area and we’re fortunate enough to have bought our house right in Portsmouth and we wouldn’t have our wedding any other way. Our wedding will incorporate this theme and it will show during our special day.
In all, our planning thus far has had no major obstacles. Of course there have been minor bumps and I anticipate some others along the way. For the most part we have agreed on almost everything and will continue to communicate the whole way through. That way we can be sure of what we both envision for the wedding actually gets played out on our memorable day.
Caterer booked!
Chef John Edmonds
Misha and I have not only found our caterer for our wedding but we have found the best deal in town! Just last night we met with our caterer, Chef John Edmonds from Mountain Caterers in Wells, Maine. Wow! What an experience. He was pleasant (not pushy) and offered us a great food package that is sure to please all our guests. The nice part is, I had last year’s menu printed and he honored last year’s prices even though his buffet prices have gone up 20%, which is $3.00 more per plate. He completely listened to what we had in mind and offered excellent choices to accommodate our desires. Whats even better is how flexible Chef John is. I told him that I want to set up the reception room the day before our wedding and he offered to bring the linens and set-up around our schedule. Whats even more, on the way out of the restaurant (the Portsmouth Brewery is where we meet) he ran into two more people who overheard our conversation and wanted to book their weddings with him. Now the truly great thing–John came back to our table just to tell us this and was so excited that “we were good luck charms” that he threw in another appetizer for us to order that will complement our menu, for free! Yes for free! Now thats what I call personal care and attention! We left feeling incredibly happy that we not only chose what we believe to be the best food and deal for our wedding, but feeling like we were individualized and honored and not just another wedding couple.
I would highly recommend Mountain Caterers for your next function! Chef John is sure to make your function according to your personal style and preference, and you’ll feel special and taken care of. Thats what it is all about!
December 30, 2008
‘Glass Ceiling’
…..We all have that ‘glass ceiling’ (obstacle) we hope to overcome in life
For me my glass ceiling in life is following a prescribed set of directions, given all at once and then be expected to orchestrate the task in the exact manner in which it was dictated. Let me explain.
Early on in life, as a twin, I was told that one of the two twins develops a little slower mentally than the other. That would be me. At first I appeared to lag behind in reading. That problem soon became resolved when it was noted that I had problems hearing due to repetitive ear infections. But all thorughtout my schooling it didn’t answer why I have had difficultly following directions. When given a set of directions as a child say, take out your math book, turn to page 33, do problems 1-10 but first get out your ruler, I wouldn’t know which direction to start first.
As an adult I have the same inability to follow a lot of directions given at once. I have a fear of being embarrassed in front of people when this occurs. That is why in order for me to understand wholeheartedly the task given I try to be proactive about it and ask a plethora of questions to try and avoid that fear. Whenever possible I learn by watching others and taking my time to try it out. I teach in this way to my second graders as well. The best way to learn, is to teach!
However it doesn’t always work out that way. When life hands you challenges you must try to rise above it. I have been challenged with this fear in a recent competition that set out many given directions at once to follow. I believe I did the best I could but my inability did play out for all to see. More importantly now that I know what I need to do in order to try it again and make it better I will. Because as I say, practice makes better and we all should be given the opportunity and time in life to make better.
Before I turn 60 I hope to travel to a third world country and teach underprivileged children. I hope to get there by way of sailing across the seas with my fiance. I mentioned these things because both things would require a lot of new learning for me. Misha and I love the water and I want to learn how to sail and read maps . Then once I get there I want to do what I love, teach, and give another part of the world my passion.
Premarital Counseling
- Is it for you?
Recently engaged couples face a lot of decisions before they walk down the aisle. Choosing whether or not to attend premarital counseling is one of those decisions couples need to consider. What types of premarital counseling exist out there and who frequently does them? What is the usefulness to the “average” couple? The answers to these questions are the focus of my blog for this week.
Premarital counseling, according to Angela Ann Holloway from,: http://marriage.suite101.com/articile.cfm/premarital_counseling
says that it helps damage proof a relationship before couples are at risk. Premarital counseling assists couples in developing skills to help them successfully get through their marriage. It identifies areas that may be of concern so that they do not become conflicts later on.
Who offers the counseling? Like other therapies there are many ways to administer counseling. Ministers or religious advisor’s offer small group sessions and/or individual sessions. Premarital counselors also offer therapy sessions with a trained therapist. No matter which route a couple may seek, it is advised that they take a look at their PMI (and I am not talking about mortgage money ) but instead a Pre- Marital Inventory or questionnaire.
PMI is an inventory of questions that help couples decide whether to seek counseling or not. Questions include (but are not limited to) interests, role expectations, finances, sexuality, religion and family issues. Once the questionnaire is complete couples can then make a more accurate decision to have counseling before their wedding. However the statistc remains true that 50% of all marriages today end in divorce. When premarital counseling is taken before the marriage, the divorce rate is significantly reduced up to 30%. So if that is the case should all coupes seek premarital counseling? Other deciding factors include: if the couple is young, or has commitment-phobia, if they have different faiths, abusive pasts, medical conditions, or if significant issues cannot be resolved between the two of them, than the couple should look at some help before they make their commitment.
My feeling is that any type of communication whether it be with a counselor or not, is crucial for a marriage to work. The couple should know about the big and small issues amongst each other before they plunge into a lifelong commitment. Counselors are not the only answer to help couples make it today. There are many books such as, Susan Pivers’s best seller, The Hard Question: 100 Essential questions to ask before you say I do, that can shed some light to newly engaged couples. As long as the couple knows (for the most part) what they are getting into ahead of time, then they should be able to enjoy a life long marriage to one another!
- 100 Essential Questions to ask before you say I do
December 26, 2008
Jingle Bells
….Jingle Bells, Jingle bells, jingle all the way
Doesn’t that song just stick in your head forever? Well thats called an ear worm, when you can’t get a song to leave your head. Well Jingle bells is certainly that song for me. As a kid I always loved that song. Now teaching second graders I still not only sing that song with my kids but I also use American Sign Language and teach the kids to sign the song while they sing. I wish I had video of them doing it, it is too cute!
The song “jingle bells” according to the Wikipedia website, “is one of the best known and commonly sung winter songs in the world. James Lord Pierpont (1822-1893) wrote the lyric.” It is not just a Christmas song but rather a “sleighing song” sung in wintertime. Another interesting fact is that Jingle Bells was actually the first song to be broad casted from space! No wonder I love the song so much; it may not have a huge significant meaning but it is such a great wintertime song all people enjoy it, even from outer space!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jingle_Bells
Happy Holidays!
Remember when??
It’s the holiday season and if you are at all like me you remember what the season was like for you as a child. Ahh the ‘Christmastime’ of year-a time to celebrate with family, old and new friends and those you cherish. A time for traditions, keeping the old and starting the new. A time to awaken the senses for good times and cheer!
As a child growing up with my twin sister by my side, a big sister and brother and mother who got into the Christmas spirit like Mrs. Claus, there was nothing more exciting than the holiday season. Our celebrations started Friday, the day after Thanksgiving. We would all lug up mom’s dusty old cardboard boxes from the basement and unfold the flaps revealing our special family generational decorations. Now all four of us kids each had our decorations that we were possessive over (okay maybe it was actually only me) but no one could touch the cool ceramic village set complete with lights , miniature trees and fluffy snow, except me. My twin sister would arrange the manger, and my older sister had this obsession with a Santa door hanging that rattled when you shook it and was the rattiest Kris Kringle you ever did see (she now has old Santa hanging on her front door for her kids to enjoy!) The sight of the house being transformed from regular decor to a winter wonderland was like stepping into Santa’s workshop. There wasn’t a spot in the entire house left undecorated. The candles in every window glowed red like Rudolph’s nose, the million little Rodney reindeer covered every couch and chair, and the extra large colored tree light bulbs illuminated the house that there was no need for lamps during the season. The transformed house was only the start of the traditions we did during December.
Thanksgiving weekend didn’t just include decorating, but rather some other holiday traditions that have remained in my family for generations. My mother always makes her remarkable holiday candy plates. No one bakes with more love and sentiment than my mother. Her fudge melts in your mouth, her peanut brittle brings you back in time and her health bar puts Scor Bars to shame. Only she is responsible for those tasty treats. But the part where all of us as a family comes into play is making homemade molasses taffy. The smell of the caramel covered sweet stuff boiling in the cauldron makes you feel like you are standing inside a gourmet candy shop. After letting the taffy boil she then brings it outside to cool in the white snow. The anticipation of waiting for it to be just cool enough to hold is overwhelming. Once the taffy is ready we all roll up our sleeves, spread butter all over our hands and table and get a tennis ball size of taffy to start pulling. The object is to pull the taffy from a dark caramel color to a light golden brown, and this stuff is hot! What a feeling you get pulling taffy the old fashioned way, and smelling the sweet delight as you pull and pull. Afterwards once the desired color had arrived you then make a snake shape and the strong guys cut the treat into bite sized pieces. The gals then individually wrap the taffy with wax paper and put them in a bowl. The best part comes when you can finally taste the hard work that you helped to create. Oh the sticky buttery taffy just tingles your tongue. But one needs patience to eat it, because if you start to chew it, your teeth will not appreciate it. This tradition is by far the most memorable and one we hold onto each year after year as a family. It has grown to include our families, significant others, children and grandchildren.
The last tradition (and certainly not the least) is Christmas eve. Early in the season we all put our names into a hat and pick someone’s name out (this includes only us siblings, our husbands, wives, and Misha). Then we buy a $50 gift for them and open it up on Christmas eve. It is so fun to see how creative we all get in finding that perfect gift for someone special. After gifts we enjoy the biggest italian feast you can imagine. The appetizers, lasagna, breads, salads, desserts and drinks temp all that enter my moms quaint condo. The fire is roaring and meanwhile the kids are touching all the gifts to see which ones are theirs. Sounds of laughter, love and holiday tunes fill the air and the true meaning of the holiday is present; family, friends and food help make the holiday spirit alive and enjoyable.
Even as a 31 year old I wholeheartedly enjoy the holiday traditions that my family and I have created. Each year we look forward to bringing our families together to celebrate old times and make new memories. I know that if I am lucky enough to have my own family someday that I too will carry these traditions on. Thats what makes the holidays so special and memorable!
December 23, 2008
Cucumber and Dill “yummy” anytime appetizer
Here is a wonderful app that is sure to make any party a pleasure–and it’s super easy!
Ingredients:
- One large seedless cucumber
- Packet of Zesty Italian dressing
- Breton brand or Large wheat cracker
- Whipped cream cheese tub
- fresh dill (or dry dill herb)
Mix together the Italian dressing packet into the tub of whipped cream cheese. Peel and slice the cucumber into round slices. Spread a dollop of the cream cheese mixture onto the wheat cracker and top with the cuc. Fianlly sprinkle the dill onto the top of the cuc and enjoy! It’s a crowd pleasure and very easy to take on all outings, including holiday galas. Enjoy!
~Love Tricia
